When I was a young there used to be a common saying you used when you were being teased. It went, “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but names will never hurt me.”
Though you would parrot these words, you knew deep down in your heart this was not actually the case. Unkind words that were used in name calling not only stung but at times cut deep. So deep in fact that decades later, you could still hear these words being thrown in your direction, to the point they hurt as much as broken bones!
Our words can be powerful and are important.
There is an old Chinese proverb that states: “If you have a soft voice, you don’t need a big stick.” Life has taught me that most of the friction in human relationships is caused by not necessarily only the words we speak, but more often by the tone attached to the words we share. What we say is important of course, but how we say things is just as important. Our speech conveys our thoughts; our tone of voice, however, conveys our mood and our heart!
In the Old Testament Book of the Bible, Proverbs, Chapter 16 and verse 24 it states, “Pleasant words are honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones.”
This verse, and other verses throughout the Book of Proverbs, does not actually say we should focus on the right tone of voice. Rather, the implication of Proverbs 16:24 is clear in the instruction that the words we use should be kind, gentle and tender.
Of course, you can say things with a kind and caring tone without any real feelings of kindness at all. Others are quick to pick up on the insincerity of what and how things are said. This is why God’s word in the Bible urges us to not only seek a change in behaviour, but a change that goes right down to the core of our being. Change such as this, deep change must always come from the inside out, otherwise it is not real change at all. This is why we need to allow God’s Word, found in The Bible, speak to us. And if necessary, cauterise our tongues and mould our hearts to only allow words that reflect our Creator to proceed from our mouths.
As I sit with a challenge like this, I come to realise that the wise are those who understand how their words impact another person, for good or for bad, and commit themselves to using words as instructed by the Apostle Paul in Ephesians 4:29: words that are “helpful for building one another up.”
The Staff and my prayer is that as we will bring God’s Word to our students each morning in Daily Devotions. As we do, they will see and hear in us how to be wise with words. We pray that they too can possess the wisdom to know when to hold their tongue when they should, speak when they should and ask God for further wisdom to enable their words to be sweet to the soul and heal broken bones.